I'm having a party

I guess I am back tracking, but I didn't really have the time or energy nor did I really want to lay out a whole big pity party for me and my family on here last week.

So, since I am officially having the aforementioned pity party, I'm just gonna lay it all out.

My uncle had heart bypass surgery last week. 6 bypasses. 6!! It is just a miracle he was even alive to have the surgery. Amazingly, he came home only a few days later. Sore, but home.

My husband had been having terrible indigestion and heartburn with chest pains. He went Monday for a wonderful Barium milkshake Upper GI and an ultrasound of his gallbladder. We found out Wednesday (not a good day) that he has a Hiatal Hernia that may require surgery if medication doesn't help his symptoms.

And then there's me......I had a D & C yesterday. To say the least, it was not as bad as I had originally thought it would be. I still feel guilty and unsure of my decision to go that route, but patience is not one of my virtues and I could not just sit in anticipation of the actual miscarriage. I was told, in my situation, it could possibly take 2 weeks for the baby to miscarry on its own. Not exactly something I wanted to wait and find out. I couldn't have went for groceries without thinking 'is it gonna happen in line at the IGA.'

Grady is still a little confused. He thinks if we pray hard enough that God will let us have our baby back. Poor guy. I don't know exactly how to explain to him that we will just have to wait and see if we can get another one a little further down the road.

Alright, I think I have bored everyone to tears hearing about all my problems.....but, before I quit writing, I just want to thank everyone for the meals, calls, prayers, emails, and words of encouragement I have gotten over the past week. They mean so much and have helped tremendously.

I don't know if she reads this or not, but Kelly, you have been my saving grace. I wouldn't have wished any of the heartache you have endured on my worst enemy, but I am thankful that you have been through this type of situation and are able to say just the right thing when I need to hear it and make me laugh about touchy matters (you know what they are) when it counted. I love you!

Last, but not least, Mom, Dad and Chris. What do I say? I'm sorry. That's what I really want to say because I feel like I have let you all down. This pregnancy was something that had brought us all closer in the last 2 months. I am so very happy to have done that for us, but feel guilty for not being able to carry it through. These emotions are something I will be working on myself for quite a while, I'm sure. Truthfully though, THANK YOU so much for being there for me. Driving me to Effingham, taking care of Grady when I couldn't and just giving me the hugs and space at the times when I needed either of them. I don't know how I can ever repay those gestures. Time will ultimately heal, but until that time passes, I am glad you are here for me. I love you guys so much and am proud to call you my family.

Okay, that's it.......party's over......for now.